Pants off, penetrated and slimed all in under a minute thirty while not missing a step on those stubborn limescale stains around the grout lines. I don't know if this is a personal best, but he should probably submit the attempt to speedrunslive.
Slammin the salami is no easy task when you're choosing the barn door, and your costar is commonly mistaken for items in Home Depot's gardening section. But her? She'll never know the sweet kiss of General Tso's blast furnace ever again.
Perfect hair. Clean skin. But what really sets her apart is the pristine turd cutter on display around the 7:50 mark. Once she shifts into 2nd gear it starts winking in morse code. So hypnotic you'll almost forget that cocoa puffs are made in there.
She ran roughshod on pre-OnlyFans Internet for like a week. Then disappeared as quickly as the stain between your cheeks materializes three bites into a Chicken Enchilada Burrito now being served after 2 AM at your local Taco Bell ® [more]
The average American mall has less activity than a graveyard today, so maybe consider this some sort of historical moment instead? A time when window shopping for meat this discounted was considered a communal act. #nostalgia
Unilaterally super soaking home turf without as much as laying down a blanket or wearing a form fitting adult diaper? In this economy? Its more likely than u think...
[chloe night]: she disappeared from the scene just as fast as she bulldozed into it, leaving in her wake a collection of [questionable] amateur tomfoolery. #weird
If her facial expressions look familiar to you, then you too have felt the sweet kiss of Red Lobster's endless shrimp platter. A feeling taken from us all too soon...
Take a culture that considers Rick and Morty comedy, crossbreed them with an addiction to experimental street drugs & this is the result. I haven't seen someone this confused w/ the flavor in their mouth since Wendy's started selling breakfast.
It's pretty unbelievable what kind of deals still exist if you're just willing to put in the work and find seek them out. No need to negotiate on price either. Just lay down that $18.00 [USD] and let the all you can eat vaginitis buffet begin.
Maybe taming the stinky weasel is just more of a norm in other parts of the world? Either way, dude is sitting on a goldmine of a significant other here and the Internet demands more of her content including access to all mud buttons.
Gonna have to put emphasis on the final clip, in what will surely be the biggest "can surgery fix this?" clip you'll see today. MORE: [-1-] [-2-] [-3-] [-4-] [-5-] [-6-]
Debuting your asshole with this man as your costar is the equivalent of taking your drivers license test at a destruction derby. Against all odds she somehow she not only survived her rectal rearrangement, but thrived for many years to come.
A better title for this one would be "Last nights pasta primevera makes a surprise reappearance but my daughter can't stop violating herself for strangers in Uzfukisthan so I can't use my own shitter". Unfortunately there's a character limit.
It's one thing to beseech the good name of a private education institution. It's another to do it to the tune of $27.00 per month. Now somebody invite her to Knicks locker room. She could be doing a lot more good for the world right now.
Proficient camera angles and lighting, or a man that was actually conceived by a fucking Clydesdale? I'm sorry, I just don't have the answers behind this mystery.
After making it to the end of this zero budget shit show I'm inclined to believe it should've stayed forgotten. The full version is over an hour long and makes The Blair Witch Project look like it's part of the Scorsese catalog. I do not recommend.
