One day I'm gonna edit some home videos into this series. A night behind Tim Hortons comes to mind. She had the kinda lips that swung around like a basset hound's ears during a tropical storm. I never looked at recycling the same again.
A penis that probably needs it's own life boat, and an insanely high tolerance for pain. If there ever was an instructional video on why to lock the fucking door in public places, I'd declare these two just laid the groundwork for a mf'n sequel.
You would think one day in the future a video of your significant other being railroaded in the shallow end of a pool human sized petri dish would return to haunt you. And if u do, u'd be right. She'll never show her face in Walmart again.
Bum-rushing your pseudo family members: Apparently it's the stepping stone for every 40-something female that wants to continue her pornographic legacy. Most ladies have enough respect to decline. But this mom has a different approach...
Normally girls that willingly accept this much upper respiratory abuse are still trying to trade in their Marlboro Miles for for walkmans and swiss army knives.
Took a minute, but that's the same girl from clout delivery guy video. I recognize that copy/paste build-a-bear tiktoker paint by numbers fashion sense anywhere.
There were definitely a couple moments of genuine concern on her face here. Somewhere in between the third and forth attempt to block the airway and force her to breath through her anus like a turtle [proof] she seems slightly distressed.
I'm positive this is the same woman that keeps invading my Instagram feed with videos about having squirrels up her ass, or publicly shaming herself over having the vaginal odor of a Sudanese outhouse. So... it was advertising for this? I guess?
One of those moments I can overlook the obvious health code violations because the performance is legendary. Be sure to leave them a ★★★★★ Yelp review. Something along the lines of: "Service was fast. Getting pubic lice was faster.".
I was wondering what happened to the dreads girl at the :30 mark. Turns out she changed her name, but is [- still going strong -] Consider hitting up her page and adding a few clicks to her depressingly low engagement. That ass deserves more.
From this angle it looks like the kind of video set up by a guy 1 bent rare Pokemon card away from having a complete nervous breakdown. Lesson learned... I guess?
That 11-8 probably hits different when your floor manager acts like shucking his corn cob is a social activity. A note to all Burger King employees reading this: pls do not attempt. Chicken fries are all I have left to look forward to in this life.
Sleep on xhamster comments and you miss gems like this: "Pplummer69: Done this a good bit myself with homeless girls living in buildings here in town fucked and used them real good for just a few $$$. I live in Johnstown Pennsylvania"
I could be in the minority here, but Barnum & Bailey should be kept as far away as possible from any and all sexual situations. If I wanted to be repeatedly violated by a clown, I'd pay for a day trading discord. Pretty amazing body tho. RELEVANT
500 pesos spent on a gUrLz tRiP... only to end up getting swarmed by the local freelance gynecologist. Something about the return on investment seems fucky.
The side effects of letting a complete stranger turn his power level to +skidrow abortion before going Hiroshima on ur wife's dirty corncob? Literally nothing. In fact, this might prove without doubt; the inner walls of her anus are nuclear proof.
Impressive reasoning here. "muh vag is too tight for recreational use, so I'll make up ground and double butter the brown bagel." Math may not be her strong point.
"My talent know more about you than you. You stupid bitch."
"I'm a fuckin professional, and you're just a whore."
"You're just here to choke on cock right?"
Pusèy Clogusious inadvertently foils the master plan of Adam22's side chick when he convinces her to go live mid-smackdown. Her response? Gigglin like she found an extra tender in her 4-piece Chic-fil A to go box. Relationships shlamationships.
I said it before, and I will say it again: is she green screening her husband with multiple overlays to make it look like the local janitor union is lining up to get their own serving of butt crabs to go? Technology may have peaked before A.I.
What in the fucking Doogie Howser, M.D. are we seeing here? I'd give him the big W for going the distance... but no amount of THOT slaying in the world is going to change the unfortunate genetic make up of that boogie board he calls a body.
Honestly, simulated sister banging needs more goofballs like this. Especially if they involve [-Aubry Babcock-] cringing her way through another gigagasm.
Normally I'd be the first to out this as being faker than the tip I left a Door Dasher that dropped $75.00 worth of Del Taco (see: 1 value meal). But I did the research, and turns out these 2 share more DNA than Gene Simmons in the 70's. [more]
Kinda wondering why this specimen chose not to continue her journey into the world of reckless colon cleanses. Those facial expressions at 5:35 are just iconic.